Day 138: Disappointment

my world was rocked. upended. so much swirling around in my mindheartspirit. and all she could say was, that’s nice.

i reached out again, in a moment of big feeling, chest bursting, tears welling. but quickly the narrative became about her.

but this isn’t new. no. this has been the dynamic all along.

charges of selfishness seeded doubts of my intentions.

feigning victimhood made me feel as though something was always wrong with me.

i don’t know how to feel. my world was rocked. upended. with so much swirling and all she could do was make it about her.